Radiant

Those who look to him are radiant

Their faces are never covered in shame

So let afflicted hear and rejoice

I will cry out, I will call out.  

I sought the Lord, He answered me

He delivered me from my fears

Taste and see that the Lord is good

Blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him  

The righteous man has many troubles

But God delivers him from them all

Fear the Lord, you his saints

He will redeem those who take refuge in Him

This song once again spoke to my heart today.   I feel the last few years all I have done is walk in shame, guilt and self pity.  I have realized that I am a person that really seeks the approval of others.  I constantly struggle with wanting to be something or someone that people will approve of and like.  When I look in the eyes of others I am usually looking to see if they see me as one that is worthy of love or acceptance.  Will they like me, do I need to change who I am in order for that to happen...all questions that go through my head every day, every conversation.   When will they leave, what will I do to stop them from liking me. But today felt good.  As I thought and pondered the words of this song while at Worship today I was in awe how I could face the Lord with out shame.  There have been times I thought I needed to be severely punished for some of the things I have done.  

So my prayer is that in this life I will daily taste and see that the Lord is good.  That I will face him with out my head down and choose just to be in awe that he has chosen me, instead of why he shouldn't.  Blessed is he who takes refuge in Him.  I am going to try my best to rest in that and choose to believe Him and say yes!  I am Radiant.

If you would like to hear this song you can down load it for Free From Mars Hill Church

Missing her

It has been one of those weeks.  The kind of week I wish was over and forgotten, never thought about again.  The one when I think about my mother.  I miss her.

I am not even sure I know what I even miss.  It is not like she was a "normal" mother.  She loved me of course, but her love was much different then the love we all long for and want.  I think I mainly miss the idea of having a mother.

Jesus,  I am so weak right now.  

I have been avoiding this blog.  Too hard to write how I feel because I feel I shouldn't be feeling the way I do.  No joy in these circumstances.   No love.  Just this broken heart that needs to be healed.  

Wordless Wednesday

Be My Valentine

Every year I try to come up with some cheap and crafty way to do Valentines Day. While I don't buy into the whole overpriced dinner it is always fun to make things cute for the kids. Last year I added heart shaped sprinkles to there cheerios. This year I am making Chocolate Dipped Fortune Cookies. Yummy!

Step #1- Get your supplies

Bag of fortune cookies from Cash n Carry ($3.64)

Bag of Chocolate Chips $1.64 at Walgreens (no longer there)

1-2 Tablespoons of Shortening (do not use butter)

Sprinkles $4/5 at Albertsons (current)

Wax paper (already had)

Step #2- Melt Chocolate, Dip & Sprinkle

(watch out for Mr. Grabby hands)

Step #3- Look at your pretty Valentines! You will certainly impress your little ones :)

And if you want extra credit you can remove the fortune and replace it with a cute little note. I am going to write Happy Valentines Day from Reese in Red

Now to some this may be expensive thing to do, but I am catering the food for our Mystery Shopper tour coming this week so I will get full use of these puppies! We have a few spots left so if you want to come let me know. Saturday February 13th from 8:30am-5pm. I have no idea where we are going all I know that it is fun and covers all areas of shopping!!

Under Construction

Last Thanksgiving I found these bar stools at the Goodwill. They are not my favorite, but with the constant flow of entertainment that goes on at the Bustanoby house I needed some extra seats for our bar area. So for $3.50 I think I did pretty good. I also thought it would be nice to transform these puppies into something cute. While I will probably not get this this for awhile I thought I would let you know what was going on in my head. Do you see the potential? I know by the picture they don't look half bad, but they are starting to come apart on the wicker. So this will need to be done. I asked my husband this morning if he would be able to help me and he said "I like them the way they are" code for you have way to many other things going on to be doing this right now! I don't think he knew what he was getting into when he married me. But he loves me and he said he would help. Love that guy! So one day you will get a peak at this treasures of mine. The choosing of the fabric is going to be the hardest part. There are way to many choices out there. And the more I write this post the more I realize that the name of my blog fits me perfectly. I am constantly "Under Construction" I don't think it would be me if I wasn't. I love changing things, making things, and doing things. I am trying to learn how to sit still and be quite, but I think that is going to be a life long journey.

Free Spirit

That is my Ava. She is infectious and makes you want to have fun. And do you see something different about Reese? Yep, no more front teeth! My girls they are great.

Hair Clips & Nursing Covers

Here are a few little projects I have done lately. Thanks to my cute little girl she modeled my hair clip. She is my biggest fan I think. Hopefully you like them too :) Like anything else I make they are for sale. My nursing covers are $20.00 and my hair clips are $4.00. I can make those in pretty much any color you would like. And I think they look great with any outfit. And yes I wear them too! So place your orders ;) I think they would be great for Bride Maids and Flower girls!

Do you miss me?

Right now I am busy with www.couponconnectionsnw.com but soon I will be posting you about my life and the other things that I am doing :) Hope you are all sweal and love to hear from you!

Tagged

Remember this one ladies...

I am: needing a vacation
I think: life is really hard, but well worth it
I know: Jesus loves me
I want: to push a button and everything be cleaned up in my house
I have: to go pick up newspapers and I am dreading it
I wish: Collin worked at the port full time
I miss: my mom & sephora
I feel: sad now that i thought of my mom
I hear: the kids playing were there new LOUD toys
I smell: coffee
I regret: no being patient with my kids all the time
I love: when you first get into bed....cozy
I always: love getting the mail
I am not: very nice to myself
I believe: in eternity
I fear: Matt 7:21
I cry: when I feel like someone doesn't like me
I don't always: wash my face at night
I fight: comparison
I never: return my books to the library on time
I listen: not often enough
I need: extreme home makeover
I am happy: that I have a healthy family

If you are reading this then you are next! Copy and paste to your blog with your own answers.

Merry Christmas

The stockings were hung at the chimney with care in hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there.....

We were able to carry out our family tradition of going to the Ginger Bread house in Seattle and riding the Carousal. Sadly my battery died before I could snag a picture of the houses. They were amazing! But I did manage to get a few ;)

This little bucket band was amazing! They even let some of the kids play!

My darlings! By far this is the best year for my kids. Dallas made sure that everyone heard him and Ava did all the hand motions! If I could just pause them for a awhile I would because this is just too precious!

Reese made sure that she was noticed at the end! She was grooving!

And Norah is still carrying the title for "mischief maker"! I am hoping that she will not do this again. I am proud of myself for taking a picture because it was too cute. Reese said that "this was the weirdest day of my WHOLE life!"



Grandpa and Grandma came out for a trip. The kids were surprised with some early Christmas presents! We went out for pizza and watched the video of the Christmas play. It was a good day!

This season has been busy busy! But it has been good. I am a little late at posting a lot of these pictures, but better late than never :)

Hope that you all are filled with the love of Christ. May God richly bless you with His abundant love! Oh and Dallas....Harry Potter called. He wants his glasses back!

Giveaways

Now who wouldn't want a new computer....there are several sites that are giving away and New HP touch screen computer...

1. kelly
2. Totaly Together Reviews
3. Mckmama
4. NieNie Dialogues
5. BooMama


Merry Christmas!

I heart these and So should you....

A friend of mine was wearing something similar to this and I just had to have one! Come to find out they are 30 $ at Nordstroms! So I decided to make it myself. So let me know if you would like one too. Of course you will get a friend discount and it will only cost you 10$ ;) These are all made for adults, but I also have kids sized headbands as well. Comments are always appreciated and you may just think this is the most ridiculous thing ever. IF so please let me know that too.

FYI I love this Guy D A L L A S

He has officially been knighted. When I got home from the store I think I about melted seeing the Joy and Happiness in this little boy. He had his shield, sword and helmet ready to conquerer! He was quite proud and had every reason to be.

And this. This is one of his drawings. To get an idea of what the kids might like for Christmas (and to busy them for a few hours :) I gave them some paper, glue, scissors and Toys R' Us toy magazines to cut out a few things they may want for Christmas. He kept asking me how to spell "Robot Dump Truck" My favorite part of this whole thing is the 49.99! My goodness how stinkin cute is that!
I am so thankful that we held him back this year because I am have such special time with this boy. He is taking over my heart in so many ways and it is great! Thank you Jesus for such a wonderful boy!

And these little ladies....Treasures

And just stop it right now! Growing that is. Reese looks so pretty and grown up in this picture. I just LOVE her. I love All of my kids and am thankful for each one of them.

I am also thankful for the Parsons. Sara has been one great friend over these last 6 1/2 years! Sara can you believe it has been that long. Last month we were blessed to stay at the Parson B&B :) It was crazy with all our kids, but SO much fun and we needed a little weekend getaway. We also picked up a few new habits like sitting on the counters. My kids thought it was the greatest thing ever. Thank you Sara for such a great friendship you have really been a blessing.

This one is at our house :)

So in the midst of all these struggles.....there are many many good things. God is so good, faithful and loving to us. And I am enjoying this year with Him more than I ever thought I would. Thank you to all that have been there and listened.

miss you

blogging how i long to do it again. so much to say, but so little time. why is it that I can't leave my house a mess and just come and type away. what is it about you anyway. when I do have the time i am left speechless. but now that i don't have any i want to type my heart away. well my friend we will meet again...yes we will meet again

Poor Sephora. I continue to pray that she is in the arms of Jesus. 8 years ago my husband led her to the Lord. I can't say that I noticed to much change in her, but I hope. Hope is what I will hang on too. So sorry Sephora.

organizing

I have been doing a whole lot of this lately. Trying to organize the mess I have. I started this post with the intention of telling you how I was going to change my coupon method. But the more I think about it I have been trying to organize the mess in my life. I have been really trying to make sense of it all. Why did I have the up bringing that I did? How the stuff that happened as a kid effects me now and my relationships with others. I think of how I would probably be more likable if I was brought up in a loving home and trained well. The wounds from this when I allow myself to think about them seem to much to bear. But I do know this,

¹⁹ Praise be to the Lord, to God our Savior,
who daily bears our burdens.
Selah

²⁰ Our God is a God who saves;
from the Sovereign LORD comes escape from death.

²¹ Surely God will crush the heads of his enemies,
the hairy crowns of those who go on in their sins.

When I get into the word I almost feel silly for writing the things I do. I mean we have an amazing and awesome God! Because of Him I can escape Death. I have so much more to learn, but I am starting.....starting to turn my hurt into praise. These last 2 years have been really tough and they may even get tougher but I know that God is very real. I am learning that He is the giver and taker of all things. That He does all things so that we may draw near to Him. Boy is this a tough one for me. I grew up with having to do all things for myself and not relying on anyone. It is hard and terrifying to be in a place were (going to get really honest here) I am completely dependent on Him alone. I have been a Christian for 8 years or so and I don't think I have lived that way at all. I also know that I am a person that looks to the future and when it doesn't seem to bright and shinny I start to question God and wonder what he is doing. This verse has been coming to life for me,
Matt 6
³⁴Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.
I am going to try and not fret over what could happen. Because I really don't know. My prayer is that I will focus more on the greatness of God and the good things he has done. Which includes these trials of many kinds.

And on a lighter not....changing my coupon method makes this a lot easier!

Her name is Norah and I love her

We like to call her Norah Bean. Not really sure how we came up with that....oh yeah we swaddled her to death and she looked like a little bean pod. Well she has grown out of that phase into this one....you would think that one time sucking on a marker would be enough. Nope. Not for this kid. I just finally got around to taking a picture of it. There is not one thing that she will not put in her month so she is constantly keeping me on my toes. And if you ever have this kid over you may want to hide your markers because she does mark more then just her face. But she is my favorite Norah in the whole wide world....





This is her No No face....now how do you fight with that!

Something I am sure you would love to win

Fabulously Frugal Giveway

I'm Back...

Goodness how time sure seems to fly by fast. It has been over a month since I blogged
and not even sure if I still have a following or not :) Hopefully you will all check in at some point. Part of me didn't really know what to write about. I guess you can say I have been sulking. I believe the Lord is doing a work in me and I am being encouraged by His word and His people. I am still left speechless in knowing what to write, so hopefully you will enjoy all the pictures....

Family

Reese

Dallas

Ava

Norah